Nothing funny about feldspar

“After carefully reviewing…”

So, no job for me. At least not there.

To give you an idea of how far out of it I am, I have to read Language Log to find out there’s a Sisters of Mercy tour — and I have apparently missed all of the North American dates.

But then, do I really want to hear Lucretia live?

Given my genetics and my diet, I expected to hear the doctor say “You need to take this statin drug for the rest of your life.” But you know what? My cholesterol levels (at all measures) are at or near “optimal.”

I’d consider buying the “healthy” bacon though. If it didn’t cost more than regular bacon. And if it didn’t taste like fish. Or worms. Though I’ve never eaten a worm that I know of, so I don’t know what they taste like. Maybe like pork? Or perhaps chicken?

I’ve seen more than a few posts lately including the phrase that starts “just because I have a vagina…” usually followed by “doesn’t mean I like to do housework” or “doesn’t mean I like kids” or “doesn’t mean I can’t make my own decisions.” This is probably just because them’s the bloggers I read, and it’s that whatchamacallit thingy about recency.

Anyway, I was wondering if that lead-in is the most common on the web according to Google. And you know what? It isn’t. Not by a long shot.[1]

It’s quite interesting to see how frequently the construction “just because I have a ____ doesn’t mean _______” is used by folks. I’ve used it myself at least three times here at the Rock Pile. (Well, technically, only once in this form, and twice reversed.)

Do the search yourself. Is it a cliché if we all put different words or phrases in the blanks? Is it somehow better if we vary the structure? What would be a better way of expressing the same thought of correlation but not causality?[2]

fn1: I was actually thinking of the phrase “just because I have a penis” as an alternative to “vagina” but I used the wildcard instead. “Penis” doesn’t appear in the first page, but “dick” does. The vagina variant doesn’t show up until page 2. So, instead of some sort of post about “feminism vs masculinism (masculism?)” you get a not-very-well-structured post on English.

fn2: How do English composition teachers stand it? All of the essays all look the same all of the time. My high school English comp teacher must hate blogs. She insisted that “it’s not a paragraph unless it has 12-14 sentences.” I’d fail, these days.

I rushed Albite to the vet this morning — he hasn’t been eating, and he yelped when I touched his ear last night, and he just looked uncomfortable this morning.

The vet thinks he may have an ear infection, but he didn’t see anything in Albite’s ears, nor does Albite have a temperature. But since he’s not having difficulty walking, and this came on suddenly, and so forth, we’re treating it as though it is an infection. Ear drops and pills for 10 days, and a pain pill. I hope it clears up. Otherwise it could be something much worse that I don’t really want to contemplate right now.

The vet poked and prodded Albite’s ears whilst I held him. And Albite fussed and yelped and sounded so generally pitiful with his little squeeks that I nearly cried. I nearly fainted when the vet came back with a handful of pills instead of suggesting something like x-rays, my relief was that palpable. How do people with children stand it when their kids are sick? I’d be a mess.