A lot of effort for not much payoff — but who cares?
Posted in Mundanity on 10/20/2005 08:57 pm by OrthoclaseI went to a casino with my mom today — one that I haven’t been to in a while (she’s never been there). It was fun in a way that is hard to describe if you’ve never won at a slot machine, or if you think that slot machines are a stupid way to throw away money. They’re a fun way to throw money away, kind of like golfing without all the gear.
Not that we won. Or rather, we won lots, but not more than we spent. But it was a nice drive on a nice day, and we weren’t in a hurry to get anywhere. The place itself is huge, which surprised Mom since we’ve mostly gone to riverboats, and has quite beautiful architecture. And thankfully, it’s not too awfully smoky. Much better than the riverboats; I just want to burn my clothes after I’ve been to one of those.
Slot machines change rather rapidly — they’ve long since stopped being a “one-armed bandit,” though they still have functional arms for those people that want that experience. The casino had multi-denomination slots where you could choose your credit value — between each spin, if you’d like. There were video slots, reel slots, reels that had video, and videos that simulated reels. And then there are the video poker machines, but we don’t play those usually.
Depending on the machine, you could bet anywhere from 1 to 21 lines, and from 1 to 20 credits per line. Usually the higher denomination machines allow you to risk fewer credits (not necessarily less money), but I did see a multi-denomination machine that allowed one to play $45 a spin. If you’re going to do that, you’d be better off at the high-limit machines (where you can bet $5 or more per credit).
Slot machines also have themes like “Bucks Ahoy” or “Filthy Rich.” Media tie-ins are also quite popular. The most popular is probably “Wheel of Fortune” which is in it’s 4th edition, I think, and right now “I Dream of Jeannie” seems to be quite the thing. Last year it was all “Austin Powers” but I didn’t see a single machine today. However, it may just be that I was at a different casino. Most people pick the video machines (in a given price category) because of their theme or their bonus round. Bonus rounds are where the real money is won, since the payouts for regular spins are usually negative (you might bet 27 and “win” 15).
The casinos and the slot machine producers work very hard to make machines attractive to a wide variety of people. Some only play the single-line reels (which I do when I want to bet higher than a nickel/credit). Some only want to play the penny machines, so a $20 bill goes a seemingly long way (however you’re encouraged to play 21 lines and 10 credits/line). Some people like to handle the coins and play only those machines that pay in cash, and others like clean hands and only play the machines that use vouchers. I find I prefer vouchers if I’m winning and coins if I’m losing.
The casino’s idea seems to work. There were mostly retirees, there, of course, since it’s mid-week, but none of those sad people you sometimes see on TV, sitting in a wheelchair wearing an oxygen cannula and straining for the spin arm. No, this is (on Thursday morning, at least) a casino that attracts yuppies — or whatever passes for same in the retiree set.
The most fun people to watch are the superstitious ones. The people (mainly women) who trace the line of the winning symbols that didn’t come up (”only that one seven and I coulda had it!”). The ones who cash out after every win, and then take from their pile to feed the machine again. The ones that very carefully choose the looonng way to place their bets instead of hitting the “same bet” button. I saw one man today very carefully bring both his hands down on the spin button, like he was performing the ritual insertion of the knife into the sacrificee.
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Wow, this is long and not very well-organized. Kinda like my day. Gosh, it was fun!
